In recent years certain words have been banned or “cancelled” from our society’s lexicon. Some words shouldn’t be used if an individual doesn’t belong to a specific group, but perhaps censorship advocates take this too far. The phrase “word police” has come to refer to those who constantly remind us that our choice of language can be harmful to people around us and perpetuate rascist or anti-LGBTQ stereotypes. 

This morning I read an article by Jack Halbertstam called, You Are Triggering Me! The Neo-liberal Rhetoric of Harm, Danger and Trauma. Halbertsam describes how the name of a longstanding San Francisco nightclub “Trannyshack” was offensive to many transgender folks and started a dialogue about whether the word “tranny” should be used or not. This is one example of how a word can be harmful or relatively harmless depending on how someone feels about it. 

People often use the words “crazy”, “traumatic” or “manic” in odd contexts, suggesting that they have no understanding of what these terms actually mean. On one hand it frustrates me to hear this, because as someone with a history of mental illness, the word “crazy” is simplistic and dismissive. On the other hand this term has lost most of its meaning so I resist policing other people’s language. 

The word “traumatic” is thrown around as if it refers to having a long work day. Trauma is defined as a near death experience rather than a painful trip to the dentist. I recently overheard a man on the street saying, “Let me explain how you should deal with trauma!” I don’t think this word should only be used by people who have experienced traumatic events but I also think our society needs to be more conscious of how we’re diminishing the meaning of these phrases. It irritates me when people compare a manic episode to being in a really good mood. This misinformation is what creates bias, warped perspectives and discrimination. 

I’d like to come up with new terminology that hasn’t had their definitions undermined by hyperbole, mansplaining and poorly timed jokes. By removing words from the dictionary, we’re focussing on the smallest details, as opposed to the bigger picture. It’s important to see that changing the language we use is only challenging one behavior. Telling a child not to curse doesn’t mean they will stop entirely. A swear jar only works in one environment, usually their home. 

I don’t want to police the way my friends or family speak but at times people cross a line; using language freely without considering who it might trigger. Throwing around heavy statements doesn’t impress me and I’m not going to try to control other people’s access to free speech. But if anyone, particularly men, want to talk to me about sexual abuse or mental illness then they should come with curiosity and respect rather than trying to illustrate their knowledge on the subject. I’m curious about other solutions for reducing ignorance besides banning words or phrases. For example, defining more clearly what mental illness is so that it’s definition isn’t blurred with pop culture’s version. 

Someone recently told me that they have PTSD after their relationship ended. I felt offended but post-traumatic stress disorder is a serious condition and the comment wasn’t said in a joking manner. I shouldn’t let these statements get to me. No matter how much these comments bother me, I can’t control what other people say. I can only control how I react to things.