Regardless of how fun and easy dating may feel, I’m still meeting a stranger in the evening, usually for dinner. Dating apps convince us that we know everything we need to know about the people we’re going on dates with. Even if I’ve gone on several dates with one person, we still don’t necessarily know very much about each other. These safety tips aren’t meant to be like an overbearing chaperone at a high school dance, they’re just ideas that might be worth considering. These tips are meant to be easy to follow and optional. In my experience some of these suggestions are more important than others. Take what works and leave the rest. 

Top 10 Dating Safety Tips:

1. Make sure you’ve topped up your Uber or Lyft balance.

Everyone needs a getaway car. There’s no shame in needing to get out of a weird date. It’s still better to pay for an Uber than to get into a stranger’s car. 

2. If they ask you to watch a movie, say, “What’s on at the cinema?” 

This often means that the guy just wants you to come over to their place. You get to call them out on their lame suggestions.  I tried it once and it worked. 

3. Beware of the booty call. 

Don’t agree to meet up after 10pm. Even if the guy buys you an uber it’s still not worth it. Why should you wait around until he needs something from you? If a guy wants to hang out he’ll be patient and see when it’s convenient. 

4. Avoid (in this order):

Massages 

Nightcaps

All night dancing 

You shouldn't even need to watch out for these things but when the main part of the date is designed to get me into bed with a guy, it makes me realize that I really don’t matter to them. Late night drinks and dancing may seem innocent but they’re often not. Going to get a massage on a date is just painfully transparent. Making attempts to lower my inhibitions is a turn off. 

5. Don’t play dumb.

Smart women are more intriguing and probably safer. Keep your wits about you! There’s no need to pretend you don’t have common sense. The wide eyed, naive act was cute in the 50s but it’s lost its purpose. Let him know you’re onto his tricks; they aren’t going to work on you.  

6. Don’t ignore red flags. 

Take a mental note of any odd behavior or beliefs. If they say they’re “just coming out of a serious relationship” or that they “only eat one meal a day and I’ve been trying to control my drinking” just take their word for it. Don’t pretend that these statements are meaningless. 

7. Share your location on Find my Friends. 

Don’t isolate yourself! Just to be on the safe side, let someone know where you’re going. Sharing your location doesn’t mean you’re entering an unsafe situation. It’s the logical thing to do. 

8. For emotional safety try to match their energy and effort levels. 

Don’t waste time on a guy who doesn’t deserve you. If he doesn’t text you for a while, resist the urge to text him later on to see if he’s still interested. You shouldn’t invest in someone who doesn’t want the same things as you.

9. Meet outdoors. 

Hang out in a public place at least for the first date. Find a busy park or coffee shop in a cool neighbourhood. It might sound romantic to go to a secluded area but it’s mostly just creepy. Dress warmly so you don’t have to go inside. 

10. Even if a super handsome man asks if you like being tied up...just run. 

Don’t think!