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Being Impulsive Helps Me Find My Flow

You know the feeling when you hit a stride? Like really hit a stride. You’re moving and grooving, you’re talking and laughing (for me, I shoot a lot of finger guns) throughout your day, and it seems like things just sort of fall into line. That space has ebb and flow — as does life — but it also has the potential to create lasting change. 

But how to get there? I live with a lot of anxiety, and let me tell ya, this space of flowing through life with confidence is not always available to me. However. Breaking past initial anxiety about making a decision, starting a conversation, beginning a project, finally cooking the vegetables I bought earlier this week, etc., I find that the next “thing” isn’t as challenging. By making a snap decision, no matter how small, I’m setting myself in motion. Being impulsive creates inertia, and inertia sends you forward. 

So let’s unpack “being impulsive,” because I feel like it gets a bad rap. I’m not necessarily asking you to make dangerously impulsive decisions or move through life without a thought or care in the world, but I’m talking about little impulses. When they gain enough traction, these impulses help me make bigger decisions in an efficient, non-anxiety-inducing way. Little impulses like, I should call my best friend and catch up and then DOING IT. Or, maybe I’ll branch out and have a cappuccino instead of an americano today because cappuccinos used to make me happy when I was younger and then DOING THAT. It’s wearing the outfit you’re unsure about because it’s outside of your usual style, but said fuck it and walking out the door anyway. It’s going to the new restaurant you’ve been wanting to try out all by yourself because you want to go, and you don’t need to wait on anyone else. It’s taking the “save it for a rainy day” attitude and throwing it away entirely. You’re living right now — why stop yourself from doing exactly what you want?

Yes, these are all small things, but they stem mostly from a place of impulsive, radical self-confidence. Bursting through those small bubbles of anxiety, procrastination, or doubt snowballs into bigger things. After you’ve started calling your friends and making fun meals and wearing that funky shirt you thrifted a while back but have been too scared to wear in public, you start making more decisions, not necessarily in an “impulsive” way anymore, but in a confident way. Maybe you say, you know what, I want to look for a new job and then you just start browsing. Or you think, wouldn’t it be cool if I traveled to [insert cool place]? and then — you guessed it — you make some moves on that idea. It’s fun, it’s exciting, and other people really pick up on that energy.

By breaking through my small anxieties with spontaneity and curiosity, I’ve found myself more willing and able to make bigger decisions and actually take initiative in my life. For a long time, I viewed impulsive and spontaneous action as something to be avoided or treated with caution — and while that’s true, I see now how multiple truths can exist, including one where I benefit by being more impulsive. 

Since implementing these practices (and trust me, it took some time to lean into these feelings, I started seeing the connection and coincidence more frequently. I’ve started to feel tired but rewarded at the end of my day, rather than passing out with the lights on and waking up to a protesting body the next day. For once, things are moving forward rather than dragging me downward, and I’m finding more appreciation for the things that previously caused me stress. I’ve also noticed the people in my life really noticing me, seeking me out, and complimenting the vibe I’m putting forward. I don’t need the validation, but it’s still cool to hear. So if you’ve been waiting for a sign, here it is: do things. Do things that make you happy, and don’t give them a second thought. If it brings you joy, embraces it, run with it, and move your life forward — wherever it wants to go.